


Blood and tears

by ZoenOut



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Blood, Female Crowley (Good Omens), Hurt/Comfort, Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), Ineffable Wives (Good Omens), a few tears, kind of sickfic??, periods suck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-06
Updated: 2020-03-06
Packaged: 2021-02-23 02:21:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23037628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZoenOut/pseuds/ZoenOut
Summary: Crowley decides to live a bit as a woman. After all, they are much more equal to men than they've been for centuries. Well, only weeks after Crowley transforms she gets her first period... It's not a nice one.
Kudos: 29





	Blood and tears

**Author's Note:**

> Yes I had my period when writing this. They really suck...

Crowley was slumped over the, newly miracled into existance, toilet seat. He- she, lifted her head painfully slowly. Suddenly it felt so heavy, as if it just wanted to fall to the floor. She moaned and ran her hand through her newly long hair. What was happening to her? The puke didn't look odd (if you didn't account for the fact that it was just bile, Crowley didn't eat much) but she'd never thrown up like this. Not unless she was drunk. It came so suddenly, first shivers, then a stomach ache and faster than she knew it she was on the floor throwing up. She coughed driely, her throat felt as if it'd been rubbed with sandpaper. She rubbed her forehead.  
Suddenly she felt something wet between her legs.  
The fuck?  
She slowly lifted up her skirt. There was blood. Bless it all.

***

Aziraphale had had a normal day. Trying to ward off customers, taking a long lunch and then closing the shop early. At the moment he was reading a book he found quite delightful. Then his phone rang. Not the stationary one mind you, his new flip-phone. That could only mean one thing, Crowley was calling him.  
"Hello?"  
A female voice answered.  
"Yeah, hey Aziraphale."  
"Who is this? Is Crowley there?" Aziraphale asked in a well meaning yet confused way. He'd never known Crowley to tell any of his human friends about Aziraphale... even less letting them use his phone.  
"Yes!" the voice sounded annoyed. "This is Crowley."  
"Anthony J. Crowley?"  
"Oh. Well Antonia now anyway. Listen, I can explain later but I've got a bit of an emergency on my hands."  
This got Aziraphales attention.  
"Oh dear are you hurt?"  
"Nonono! I just- Aziraphale just come here and... Bring some pads or tampons or just something!"  
"Oh oh alright dear. I'm on my way."  
*click*  
This could only mean one thing. Crowley was bleeding. Wether he-she... They wanted womens period products for their intended use or for something more serious he'd do better to hurry. Then again why wouldn't Crowley just miracle away the egg if they wanted to be a woman for a bit? This was most likely more serious than Aziraphale had foreseen. He quickly grabbed his coat and rushed out the door, slamming it shut behind him.

***

Fifteen excrushiating minutes later Aziraphale found himself frantically knocking on Crowley's door. He heard a grunt from somewhere inside and took that as a sign to come in. Aziraphale had only seen the appartment once before, back then it'd been messy, bookpages over the floor, a bucket next to the door and a globe in the corner. Now it was clean as ever. Aziraphale stopped in the doorway, he looked around. There. An open door.

"Crowley?"  
Aziraphale peeked through the door, hand on the doorframe. It seemed to be a bathroom. He couldn't see anyone in it yet he was certain that was where the sound came from.  
"In here."  
Ah.  
Aziraphale carefully opened the door fully. There on the floor sat a woman that looked pretty much like Crowley. She wore a short skirt, her legs where bare and she looked absolutely crushed.  
"Oh my dear Crowley..."  
"Aziraphale could you get my glasses? I'll explain after you get my glasses."  
"Alright? You're not seriously hurt are you?"  
"What?" Crowley looked both angry and confused, "No, but I feel like shit. Now would you please get my glasses?"  
She looked at Aziraphale with such a pleading look that Aziraphale simply set down the little bag he got from the pharmacy and went out the door.

***

Crowley snatched up the bag from where Aziraphale had put it. She ripped out a pad and put it in, it wasn't comfortable but at least she wasn't bleeding out all over the floor anymore. G- Sa- someone, why did this hurt so much? Her stomach was twisting, not just with nausea, it really felt as if she was being ripped apart and could do nothing about it. Her head felt all groggy. She let out another moan.  
"Crowley? I got your glasses. Can I help in any other way?"  
Crowley was prepared to say no as she took the glasses from Aziraphale's hand and put them on. But then she thought about actually moving by herself. It seemed completely impossible. Either she would be stuck on the floor or she had to ask for help for once.  
Crowley looked down when she anwered, so quietly that Aziraphale barely heard her.  
"Could you help me to the bedroom?"  
"Of course dear."

***

Crowley had expected Aziraphale to do the old arm-under-shoulders way of carrying. Instead the angel picked her up and carried her, Crowley was too surprised and tired to object although she was still embarrased and tense.

Aziraphale carefully put Crowley down on the bed. Her head was spinning and she grabbed around her waist. This really felt terrible. The mattress sank a bit when Aziraphale sat down next to her.  
"You said you'd explain. Could you, dear?"  
Crowley pinched the bridge of her nose and began explaining.  
"I thought that since there's not much of a difference between men and women anymore I'd..." Crowley grimaced as she felt a clot pass and settle in the pad. "I'd be a full woman for a bit."  
"Alright?"  
"And, well, I think I got one of those 'periods'," Crowley explained reluctantly.  
"Menstruation."  
"Whatever you wish to call it."  
Aziraphale looked confused for a moment.  
"And why didn't you just miracle away the egg?"  
Crowley glared at him.  
"Changing your corproal form takes energy, angel. Can't exactly stop it now it seems," she sighed and looked at Aziraphale with a pained gaze, "It really hurts."  
"Well if it's just a menstruation then that's perfectly normal, dear."  
Crowley looked down for a second.  
"Yeah. Normal, yeah."

***

Aziraphale had decided to stay the moment he saw Crowley by the toilet. No matter how much Crowley tried to convince the angel to just leave he wouldn't budge. He sat at the footend of Crowley's bed, researching different tips to ease periods. Crowley laid on her side while hugging a pillow.  
"Dear, it says here that wine can help with cramps."  
"Oh no, I'm not drinking wine tonight." Crowley's voice sounded dismissive.  
"How come? You've always liked drinking."  
Crowley winced and then said in a matter-of-fact tone that just begged to let the subject go:  
"Threw up a few times before you came."  
"Alright," Aziraphale had for once picked up on a tone, "If you say no wine then it is no wine. I'm glad you're feeling better."  
Crowley didn't answer that.

***

"Dear I'm afraid I can't find much... unless you want to go to a human doctor for some sort of prescription I'm afraid there's not much to do." Aziraphale smiled in a reassuring way. "I'm sure you'll feel better tomorrow."  
Crowley suddenly sat up. She ripped off her glasses and stared at Aziraphale.

***

"Stop saying that! Stop saying that it'll pass and that I'll feel better and that it's normal!"  
Aziraphale looked stunned but soon came to his senses enough to answer.  
"I'm sorry, I was just trying to make you feel better. Truly."  
"Well it's not making me feel better at all so please just stop."  
"I'm sorry."  
Aziraphale looked pondering for a moment before he spoke again.  
"How does it make you feel?"  
Crowley seemed to think about it. Then a horrible look of realization flowed over her face.  
"As if..." she breathed in, "As if it doesn't matter. As if you think I'm overreacting or as if you don't want to listen."  
Tears started brimming in Crowley's eyes as she sat and stared at Aziraphale. She quickly caught herself and wiped them away but Aziraphale moved closer and put his arms around her.  
"I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I am truly sorry Crowley. I didn't know what to do, I should have asked you instead of making you feel like that."  
Crowley whispered something like 'It's fine' but the tears started overflowing and she let out a harch sob. She caughed in a dry, forced way.  
"I'm fine!" she almost screamed into Aziraphale's shoulder. "I am fine..." she croaked again.  
"I know dear."  
Crowley sobbed again and held onto Aziraphale, taking all the built up pressure and letting it go so suddenly that the tears kept flowing down her cheeks. Aziraphale just held on and rubbed circles on her back until the sobbing turned to silence.

***

The week passed, although very slowly. Crowley kept her woman appearence and began taking birth-control, not that she planned on doing anything that could leave her pregnant but if that was the kind of periods she had she'd prefer to not get them. 

So one day when Crowley was walking around downtown wearing a ridiculously short skirt and daggerpumps, just some tempting she liked to do in her spare time, something caught her eye. A poster.  
"FREE MENSTRUAL PRODUCTS FOR ALL.  
Rally on Friday 6/3, 15:10, Oxford street."  
Crowley snapped a miraculously clear picture of the poster and sent it to Aziraphale, four simple words following it:  
"You're coming with me."

***

It had been a morning with overcast, as per usual. Crowley had gone to Aziraphale's bookshop.  
"I'm glad I got you to come but you can't walk next to me."  
"Why not?"  
Crowley sighed, not exactly at Aziraphale, just as a reaction to Aziraphale's words.  
"Well if I know this kind of thing right there won't be many men there."  
Aziraphale lifted one eyebrow in question. Crowley put her hands together and lowered them to point at Aziraphale.  
"You're going to be one of the few men there. I won't let them think that I forced you to come."  
"You are the one who showed that poster..."  
"But I didn't force you! You'll like being there! And letting people think that the woman in your life forced you to go isn't making any kind of a statement!"  
Aziraphale nodded slowly, he seemed to accept Crowley's proposal.

***

As the afternoon rolled around and people started gathering for the rally the clouds split. A blue sky and a shining sun met the Serpent of Eden as she came walking there, sign under her arm. The sun also shone on Principality Aziraphale, Guardian of the Eastern Gate, as he stood next to a woman he didn't know holding one of the sticks letting a sheet with the words "free the bleed" flow high over the heads of the people. As people came together for rights to a basic neseccity the sun shone, even above London.

***

That's how the Serpent of Eden, Tempter of Eve, found herself standing in sunshine at a protest for menstrual products.  
She sighed quietly.  
Being a woman could truly be wonderful.


End file.
